Professional Documents
Culture Documents
theChris t ianatheist
Craig
Groeschel
Groeschel, Craig.
The Christian atheist : believing in God but living as if he doesn’t exist /
Craig Groeschel.
p. cm.
ISBN 978-0-310-32789-9 (hardcover, jacketed)
1. Christian life. I. Title.
BV4501.3.G755 2010
248.2'5 — dc22 2010000140
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10 11 12 13 14 15 16 • 24 23 22 21 20 19 18 17 16 15 14 13 12 11 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
Introduction
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 7
When You Believe in God but Don’t Think You Can Change
123
Chapter 8
When You Believe in God but Still Worry All the Time
143
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Afterword
Acknowledgments
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old grad student starting her summer break. Both were tired.
Both were anxious to get home.
And both were atheists — though very different kinds.
Travis was the conventional sort. Like most atheists, he
denied the existence of God altogether. He didn’t pray, didn’t
read the Bible, didn’t attend church. The only thing he liked
about Christianity was poking fun at television preachers. He
made himself laugh out loud as he affected a thick, syrupy
accent: “I don’t believe in GAW-duh!”
During the first part of our flight, we discussed Travis’s
struggling commercial real estate business. Two years ago
he was on top of the world, routinely cutting deals in several
markets. Now he couldn’t negotiate prices at a yard sale. The
weakened economy and a smaller income had forced him to
make significant lifestyle changes, but Travis expressed quiet
hope that things would return to normal soon.
After openly sharing some of his professional challenges,
Travis asked me what kind of business I was in. Sticking
with business language, I explained that I’m in the spiritual
business — the pastor of a church.
That’s when Travis pounced: “So you’re a minister?” Doing
his best to remain cordial, he asked in an obviously sarcastic
tone, “I guess that means you believe in a literal seven-day
creation, huh?” Before I could even respond, he began blurting
out his rapid anti-Christian barrage. “No disrespect meant, but
Christians are the weakest p eople alive. They use Christian
ity as a crutch to avoid the real world. And the more vocal they
are about their religion, the more hypocritical they are.” After
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A Recovering
Christian Atheist
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Hell No
When I was eight, I attended a backyard vacation Bible school.
I was a little nervous, but the games, prizes, stories, and
unlimited animal crackers with grape-flavored Kool-Aid won
me over. The kids seemed normal enough, except for Alex, who
wet his pants twice in one day. (Alex, if you’re reading this, you
owe me big time for leaving out your last name.)
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Turns out it was all a setup for the final day, when the
teachers brought the spiritual heat. Like Nolan Ryan’s ninety-
five-mile-an-hour fastball, they brushed me back from the plate.
“Close your eyes. Bow your heads,” said Grownup 1, her
tone deadly serious. “I don’t want anyone looking around.”
She paused dramatically. “If you were to die tonight, do you
know for certain that you’d spend eternity in heaven? If you’re
not sure, please raise your hand.”
Still buzzing from dozens of animal crackers, and certainly
not certain about my eternal destiny, I raised my right hand.
Suddenly Grownup 2 joined Grownup 1, and they picked
me up underneath both arms and carried me to the back of
the garage. One escape route was blocked by the garage itself,
another was blocked by a chain-link fence, and the grownups’
glares completed the triangle.
I was trapped and completely unprepared for what came
next.
“If you don’t know for sure where you’ll spend eternity, then
if you die, you’ll go to hell.”
Hell! Hell? At that moment, hell seemed like the safer
option. Looking back, I’m certain these caring adults had
nothing but pure intentions, but at the time they scared the
animal crackers out of me. Taking my cue from the Little
Rascals, I crouched down and darted between Grownup 2’s legs,
then sprinted faster than Forrest Gump all the way home. Still
terrified of that nasty devil and the sulfuric fire he had reserved
for kids like me, I barricaded myself in my closet and cried out
to God, “Please don’t send me to hell!”
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nothing. With me, you have everything.” I knelt and prayed the
shortest, most power-packed, faith-filled prayer of my life.
Not so much whispering as mouthing the words, I said to
God, “Take my life.”
That was it. I had knelt down in the field as one person,
and I stood up as a completely different person. I had the
same body, the same voice, and the same mind, but I wasn’t
the same. I’d later learn that I’d become what the Bible calls
a “new creation” (2 Cor. 5:17). The old was gone; the new had
come. I had finally transformed from a Christian Atheist into a
Christian.
For the first time in my life, I believed in God and began to
live like he is real.
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An Invitation
Does any of this resonate with your experience? Was there
a time in your life that you were closer to God than you are
today? If you’re like me, your spiritual drift didn’t happen
on purpose. Like a tiny leak in a tire, slowly but surely, your
spiritual passion quietly slipped away. Maybe it has just become
clear to you. Instead of a fully devoted follower of Christ, you’ve
unintentionally become a full-time mom or full-time student or
a full-time bank clerk — and a part-time follower of Christ.
Maybe like so many, you’re a member of a church, but you’re
secretly still ashamed of your past. Perhaps you’ve heard about
the love of God, but you’re still not convinced that God totally
loves you. Or though you’re convinced God exists, your prayer
life isn’t what you know it should be. Perhaps like many other
well-meaning Christians, you know what God wants you to do,
but you still do whatever you want. Or you genuinely want to
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When You
Believe in God
but Don’t Really
Know Him
31
school girls. She was amazing, and all of the love cliches I had
heard about over the years happened to me. When she prayed
for “her girls,” heaven seemed to open. When she sang songs of
worship, time stood still. Every time she looked in my direction,
I simultaneously praised God and melted. She was funny, loyal,
and sincere. Not to mention, on a scale of one to ten, she was a
498 million. (Still is.) I remember thinking, God, you are good.
Nice work.
Overflowing with anticipation, I was constantly trying
to make a good impression, to present my best Craig. I wore
my newest shirts, put on extra cologne, cleaned out my car,
and created the perfect mix tape (packed with the latest
combination of Christian music and 1980s love songs). But
more than that, I tried to make sure I was spiritually on my best
game, praying constantly to treat her with honor and purity.
Six months after I first met Amy, I proposed to her at
church in front of all our loved ones. (Thankfully she said yes;
otherwise, it would have been awkward.) Five months later we
got married.
That was nineteen years ago, and our marriage is now
officially old enough to move out and go to college. During all
those years, I’ve come to know Amy better than I know any
other person in the world. If there are forty women in a room
all talking at once, I can pick out her voice. If I walk into a
crowded lobby, with people all crushed together, my eyes find
hers instantly. I know her scent, and a single whiff of it will
make me think about her for the rest of the day. I know her
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even the demons believe in God, and yet they tremble because
they know that they’re relationally separated from him (James
2:19). Obviously, there is more to the whole Christian thing
than just believing in God.
Growing up, my family was what I’d call “cultural
Christians.” We’d go to church on Christmas and Easter. We’d
help a neighbor in need. We’d donate canned goods to food
drives. We’d pray at Thanksgiving meals. But that was basically
the extent of it. Even though I believed in God, all I knew was
about him — and very little of that. I didn’t know him. And
because I didn’t know him the way best friends or spouses
know each other, I lived according to my own rules.
My very actions revealed my lack of intimate knowledge of
God. According to 1 John 2:3 – 4, “We know that we have come
to know him if we obey his commands. The man who says, ‘I
know him,’ but does not do what he commands is a liar, and
the truth is not in him.” A little harsh? I prefer to think of it as
straightforward and honest. Truthfully spoken by someone who
truly cares and wants what’s best for us.
We need to keep in mind that God’s commands are loving.
What God asks his children to do — like pursue justice, love
mercy, live humbly (see Mic. 6:8) — is what we want to do
anyway, at least in our best moments. We are created to be
living examples of God’s love to a hurting world.
God cares about how we live. And a relationship with God
naturally will flow out in daily attitudes and actions. So if you
look good, you are good, right? Well, maybe not. Knowing God
can lead to a positive lifestyle, but the reverse isn’t true. Our
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our single encounter. But it’s obvious I don’t really know him. If
you were to remind him about our encounter in Kansas City, he
might not remember at all.
Now let’s rewind the history tape a couple thousand
years. When the apostle Paul wrote his letter to the Galatians
(Jesus-followers who lived in the region of Galatia, modern-
day Turkey), they had experienced the real, living God but had
recently become trapped in legalism. They knew God, but not
well enough to avoid getting sucked back into a life based in
the law, rather than in love. In Galatians 4:8 – 9, Paul wrote,
“Formerly, when you did not know God, you were slaves to
those who by nature are not gods. But now that you know
God — or rather are known by God — how is it that you are
turning back to those weak and miserable principles? Do you
wish to be enslaved by them all over again?”
Paul essentially was saying, “You know God, but not well
enough to avoid your old habits — the attitudes that hurt you
and your closeness to God.” In the twenty-first century, we
would be wise to ask ourselves, “Is this us too?”
Maybe we “sort of” know God. Maybe sometime in the past
we’ve prayed and asked Jesus to transform our lives. Maybe we
have a basic understanding of God. Maybe, once, we genuinely
felt close to him. But we don’t know him well now.
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you’re apart, you can’t wait to be with them again. When I’m
away from Amy, I can’t wait to hear her voice again. Imagine
that with God.
The psalmist continues, “I have seen you in the sanctuary
and beheld your power and your glory.” I’ve seen you. I know
you. I recognize you on sight. I know what you’re like. Your
unbounded might and majesty, the sunburst of your splendor,
your beauty — these are greater than anything I could ever
imagine or describe.
Verse 3 says, “Because your love is better than life, my
lips will glorify you.” Better than life? He’s saying, If I had the
choice — either keep God’s love and see my mortal body die,
or lose his love and live — I would choose to die.
Next verse: “I will praise you as long as I live, and in your
name I will lift up my hands.” I’ll never be the same. I’m so
transformed, so overwhelmed by you, I’m unashamed to do
anything to express myself to you. I can’t keep my hands at
my sides. I’m going to reach them out toward you. I’m going
to smile. I’m going to throw my head back and bask in your
magnificent glory.
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